Insecurity No More!

I believe it is true that insecurity is a serious epidemic in this country, and I wish I could understand at what point this epidemic starting spreading to the majority. I mean let's face it, insecurity has always been around, but is it just me, or does it seem like it has progressively gotten worse and worse over the years?
Well after studying up a little and diving into some differtent literature here's some conclusions that I have personally come to:
There's all sorts of insecurity... here are some examples and thougths:
*The Bullies" - I think we have all experienced a bully at one time or another in our lives. They are the "powerful and all knowing", and usually come across as very arrogant and narcissistic. They tend to "rule" over people using fear and intimidation methods.
* The Materialistic- You know, those "trying to keep up with the Jones' " folks! They feel the need to "show off" what things they have and care too much about what other people think about thier possessions. They are overly concerned with "status" and reputation. I know many weatlhy people who keep their wealth very private and don't feel the need to "flaunt" it.... but the insecure folks definetly feel the need to let it known that they are wealthy. Now please don't get me wrong, there's nothing wrong with having nice things.... nice cars, clothes, etc. BUT have you ever met those poeple who are overly obsessed with these things, and are constatnly talking about them? I think the biggest indicator of a materialistic/insecure person is someone who is all the time focused on not only what they have/wear or drive, but are overly aware of and make exessive comments about what everyone else has/wears and drives..... anyone know what I'm talking about?
* The Dependent- they feel so bad about who they are that they have to depend on others in order to survive. They typically surround themselves and submit to the bully and materialistic types.
* The Vain-  Our society is completely focused on outer appearances and this certainly contributes to all of our worry with regard to our outer appearaces. There's nothing wrong with being proud of who you are and what you look like, we are supposed to feel that way, but those who are overly obsessed with vanity are those who are truly insecure about the way that they look and feel they need to constantly be "fixing" or changing things about themselves in order to be accepted by others.
* The Judgemetal- It is human nature to be judgemental of people. Especially if/when you've had some bad experiences with people at some time in your life. We must use good sense when allowing people into our lives, as we want to avoid the insecurity types listed above, but at the same time we have to have faith in people and try to always give them the benefit of the doubt.
I have found that again, the overly judgemental are those who have deep rooted insecurities. When the judgements and the gossip become obsessive and constant. Be aware of this, as this can be an area that you can easily get sucked into! (I know I have from time to time)

If you think that you are any of these things, don't worry!
You can change! You can grow! You can be rid of any insecurities that you have!
I believe in order to change these things about ourselves that we have to dig down deep and get to the root of our problems! Its easy to point the finger at everyone else, but how often do we really stop and think about our own actions? It is a process and one of the hardest things you may ever do because you will have to face some serious and sometimes ugly truths! Maybe you had an abusive up brining, or maybe you were constantly picked on and bullied, maybe your parents never taught you about self love, or maybe you didn't get the love and acceptance from them that you needed, maybe your worth and value has always been wrapped up in "things" or the way you look. First things first- you are a product of your surroundings so if you really want to make a change to be truly content and HAPPY, then you might have to re-evaluate who you are around and hang out with, and then be willing to make the changes if necessary. (Make people EARN the right to be a part of your life, rather then just giving yourself away!) Once your rid of that negative energy you can then start working on YOU! Dissecting your thoughts, your actions and your words and start facing whatever realities that you need to face so that you can truly LOVE yourself regardless what circumstances you are in. Ask yourself some hard ?'s : "if my husband/wife wasn't here, how would I feel about myself?", "if I didn't have these friends how would I feel about myself?", "if I didn't have this house/car/job/status how would I feel about myself?" if you answer these types of questions honestly you can probably figure out what your insecurities are and then you can begin to work on them!
One of the greatest challenges we face in our lifetimes is becoming comfortable in our own skin. A person who is secure with themselves is much more likely to achieve success, have meaningful relationships, and be respected by others.
Learn to love yourself unconditionally! Learn to enjoy yourself! Learn to enjoy your own company ! Everywhere you go, there YOU are so you might as well have love, joy and security!

have a great day!
xoxo
-JL